Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Philip Humber Wins At Life, Deserves A Week Off

So how do you follow up a miracle pitching performance? With the miracle of life, of course.

Philip Humber - owner of baseball's 21st perfect game -  is now heading home to be with his wife as they prepare for the birth of their first child.

Humber's still expected to make his scheduled start on Thursday, but, if I may: FUCK. THAT.

His baseball career will never be at a higher trajectory; it's only downhill from perfection. And four days after reaching that high, he's about to reach another: welcoming the next generation of his family.

So if I were Humber, I'd be telling Robin Ventura he can go find some other jabroni on Charlotte or Birmingham to make a spot start, because I'm taking a week off to, you know, be with my wife and new baby, and ALSO I RETIRED 27 STRAIGHT BATTERS MY LAST TIME OUT SO GO FUCK YOURSELF.

Ahem. Congrats to the Humbers on the new addition to the fam.

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